Stills from Somewhere To Disappear, a film by Laure Flammarion and Arnaud Uyttenhove with Alec Soth, 2010. 57 min.
Stills from Somewhere To Disappear, a film by Laure Flammarion and Arnaud Uyttenhove with Alec Soth, 2010. 57 min.
Untitled (Rand), 2013
Watercolor and acrylic on muslin
Sam Messenger. Quarter Cask (spiderland), 2008, pen, white ink, watercolor on paper / Pines (spiderland), 2008, pen, ink, watercolor on paper / Untitled (spiderland), 2007, pen, white ink, mixed media on paper
I have bled all one can bleed in the name of mi immortal love for all that is held upright in the weeping structures of our old world bones.
I have been brought to knees, lips worshiping the filth of the floor, third eyes kissing spots your heavy hoofs missed.
kill me now
whats dead may never die, only rule what kingdoms thrive in the shadows of our heart
Lilith in Scorpio may let you be enticed by sexual attractions easily, whereby you subordinate yourself to a more powerful partner or in reverse, or it comes to a mutually making the most of power. In this position thech stage asks for a renunciation, a sacrifice, a deprivation, for the death of something(or someone). Keywords: great interest for enigmas, mysteries, death, for the beyond Very important sexuality which may be transcended through esotericism passionate power – temptation – frustration – material ambition – fantasy – suicidal impulses – magnetism – acute lucidity – transformation or initiation – fascination – nightmares – surpassing of oneself – financial problems – rebirth – for a woman: the vamp, the witch. danger exists that you don’t recognize these powers at all, the own or those of the others. You have to deal with setbacks, accidents and symbolic as well as real deaths, although there are usually opportunities to avoid it before any danger appears. You are maybe addicted to dangers because you want to exceed borders. Possibly you had to make experiences with death in the childhood, but can see the death as an inevitable part of the life due to your large psychological regeneration ability now. It is a strong position activating desires, passions and extreme reactions. Question which are related to life and death wake up either compelling attractions or distress. A very deep mutation of the being must be done on an unconscious level through his life. Rigor, sobriety, deprivation in all life’s field is like death of one’s part. When trials are too heavy, the person may chose death, or tries to suicide. Progressions through different levels, different trials, progressions through beloved persons death, are the person’s program. The authoritarian potential is very strong here. There is also a background of violence, sexuality, and destruction where the person must not fall. Here the danger is to reverse the situation against himself when violence can’t be exerted on others. Links to death are very important. Death fascinates. Sometimes the person may chose to snatch people from death (being a physician doctor, for instance). He also may receive messages from dead persons. But if his Lilith is not well aspected, the person has to be very careful with spiritualism, as lemurs may incorporate his body and drive him crazy. In Scorpio, Black Moon gives the opportunity to always restart with energy. If disease is here, it regenerates,especially when Sun is conjunct to Black Moon. The creativity potential is important: to be an analyst, to practice hypnosis, to handle money. In any case the person as to be honest. The person will always be unable to control the evolution of the house whose cusp is in Scorpio. He will have to accept the events as they come, and will do his best in living them while hoping coming better days. Taurus opposite Scorpio will force the person to hang on to life in order to reach the harmonious life he is dreaming of. This desire will calm down his passionate tendency. Inner roots must not be destroyed like the Scorpio would do. Love of live must be respected and preserved. Life’s values must be understood. In past lives, the soul might have commanded armies, might have been a warrior. Also she might have been soaked in magic and occultism, but not in a good way : rituals, secret practices, initiations where sexuality and religion were mixed and bound to physical or psychic power. The soul might have either lived them with passion or endured them. The environment was destructive causing deep injuries to the soul with buried traumas bound to death, blood, money power and sexuality. She might have free instincts that had either destroyed people or herself. In this life person may be fascinated by this strange world of power, magic, and sexuality as he knows he has something more to learn about himself. He may be using occultism for help in his metamorphosis. Sexuality is part of the lessons. He must be careful with its use together with the use of power under the pain of getting new trials. If Lilith is at the very beginning of Scorpio, the person must change of way. If he does not, he will be stopped. The process will take place many times in his life, and each change will be drastic and will generate distress. The person will have to find an action field and organize his life on good basis. If Lilith is at the very end of Scorpio, the person will have to open himself to new horizons. Each step in his evolution will depend on the way he has evolved during the previous one. He cannot plan.
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise;
If you can dream—-and not make dreams your master;
If you can think—-and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:.
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build’em up with worn-out tools;
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings—-nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And—-which is more—-you’ll be a Man, my son!
The first secret to know about an Aquarius in love is simply that it does NOT refer to a sun-sign Aquarius person. Only someone with the planet Venus in Aquarius will be an “Aquarius in love.”
The person with Venus in Aquarius in an extremely special, unconventional, and rebellious lover. Venus in air is always a bit detached and impersonal, but here it is not as detached as in Gemini. This lover expresses love freely and flirtatiously and can stick around longer than a Gemini. You’ll know when Aquarius loves you because he sees no point in hiding it. You’ll be highly drawn to him because he excites you, he unsettles you. If you don’t watch yourself, he’ll have you half-naked in his arms where you least expect it, like at a bus-stop. But he’s not simply about the sex, he wants to read to you, study you, talk to you, and really get to know you. He is a bit of a psychologist.
You have probably heard that Venus in Aquarius values freedom in relationships. But freedom is more of a Sagittarian value. To Venus in Aquarius, shock value is more important than freedom. Venus in Aquarius will get into a tight relationship if it offers some shock value, if it upsets the status quo. They are progressive and innovative, above all. It’s not merely about freedom; they need to be extreme!
If you have Venus in Aquarius, you’re not necessarily craving the craziest lover, just the one who’s most different. For example, if your society is full of wild party animal types, then you’ll be attracted to the only homely, shy person. If you were raised a Southern Baptist, the bisexual/foreigner/atheist is the only one for you. You experience love best and most freely when you are going against the grain in your society. You refuse to fit into the mold of what is expected from you in regard to love relationships.
The goal with Venus in Aquarius is to overthrow the norms that inhibit the flow of true love. You have a real chance of experiencing the heights of true love because you simply ignore the boring rules and tread on without inhibitions. You pave the way for the evolution of our love natures. If our world is ever to grow in our definition of love, it will be due to the ideas, experiments, and crazy one-night-stands of Venus in Aquarius. It’s a lucky person who captures Venus in Aquarius; and yes, Venus in Sagittarius is highly compatible with Venus in Aquarius.
You are not Pisces-type martyrs, but you are martyrs in your own way. You sacrifice a “good” reputation for the sake of forcing the world to consider new ways of loving each other. You experiment with partners and relationships. The bad news is that all this scientific experimenting with love can leave you with an impersonal attitude toward your lover, which can interfere with close relationships. You can come across as cold and uncaring.
The Venus in Aquarius woman stands out by dressing differently or wearing her hair differently. She’s never boring. She’s unconventional.
Men with Venus in Aquarius are romantically turned on by unique people, by the strange ones, by the eccentric ones. They don’t mind quirky people; they are attracted to them.
Both Ashton Kutcher and Bruce Willis have Venus in Aquarius, as do Elton John, Paris Hilton, Taylor Swift, Quentin Tarantino, Axl Rose, Chris Rock, and Mitt Romney.
To make your Aquarius lover feel loved, you must first remember that they are an air love sign. This means that they are operating neither on the emotional, nor the physical wave. Their love language is abstract, in the mind, and understood rather thanfelt. Talking about all subjects is more romantic for them than deep emotional promises and hugs. If you have Venus in Water, perhaps you should move on now before you get hurt.
They enjoy discussing things, including fantasies. Try this: get an adult novel and take turns reading it to each other and acting out the scenes. They’ll enjoy it more if it’s outdoors.
They are not content to sit at home with you, just the two of you. In order to experience love, they need to socialize actively with many people. Be prepared for this. Remember, they need to be shocking someone with your relationship. Plan for this.
They are geeks at heart, so plan trips to the library, science museums, art exhibits, or any place that gives you the chance to discuss something. As gifts, buy them only the newest, most advanced technological gadgets. Never get them an older version of anything.
The single-most important secret to win over an Aquarius lover is to be different from everyone he/she knows. Not just a little different; you must have some shock value. Dye your hair green if you have to. If everyone in your circle is Muslim, be Jewish, or vice versa. If everyone is a vegetarian, have a burger. If everyone is an alcoholic, be the only sober one. You get the picture. Let them know that you appreciate their uniqueness. Never say that you think they’re boring or normal.
In the end, your Aquarius lover may have to move on, but they will leave you standing in awe of them rather than broken-hearted. You will have been graced with a micro-step towards evolution, and you will never be the same again.
The first secret to know about a Gemini in love is that it does NOT refer to a sun-sign Gemini person. Only someone with the planet Venus in Gemini will be a “Gemini in love.”
The Gemini lover is the charmer of the zodiac. They express affection verbally and cleverly, but they only feel it skin-deep. You may be tempted to believe one loves you because of how excited they get when you’re together, but they get just as excited when chasing a butterfly or ordering dinner. It’s hard to tell if one is sincerely interested in you because Venus in Gemini is talkative and friendly with everybody and their mother. Venus in Gemini is a kid at heart, completely at peace with lying if it suits them. Like children, they are also endlessly curious. They’re into everything (it’s been said that they have “a finger in every pie.”). The Gemini lover’s taste is always changing, and they have a constant need for new stimuli. The only thing that you can be sure of about your Gemini lover is that they will not be faithful in a traditional relationship. Monogamy is absolutely impossible for someone with Venus in Gemini. (If you happen to have Venus in Gemini and are claiming that you have been faithful in a relationship, please comment at the bottom of this article; we’d like to perform some tests on you, because you, dear, must be some sort of mutant.)
To be fair, the Gemini need for variety is not so much sexual as it is a need for mental stimulation. The Gemini lover thrives on new information. Gemini is the “net-worker” of the zodiac. They have a need to disseminate information and connect people. This is why they’re driven to talk to everyone, at the lunch counter, around town, on the street, and in bed. And they are good at it, too. They are never at a loss for words, having enviable verbal skills. They carry themselves uprightly in public, fitting right in to any social crowd. At parties, they are the center of every talk circle. They go home from a party knowing what everyone was talking about, wearing, and eating. And they took it all in within the first half hour of the party. It’s as if Venus in Gemini has a receptor antenna on top of one’s head, receiving all sorts of information. They are totally aware of the people in their environment. Not the feelings of people (like the water signs are) but rather the rational thoughts and ideas of people. Robert Pattinson and Megan Fox both have Venus in Gemini, as did President JFK.
The Gemini lover never really means any harm; these are not fighters like Aries, nor manipulators like Scorpio. They can’t understand why you’re upset that they left you home alone with your boring movie while they went to look for something more fun to do. They are sincerely confused when you get angry at them for forgetting your birthday. They want you to understand that the reason they forgot your birthday is because the lady at the lunch counter had the most interesting story to tell, so your Gemini lover never made it your house that night. They are like easily distracted children. And you always forgive them because they have the most charming smiles and always say the right words. They like to remain friends with all of their past lovers, they cannot bear to end friendships. Friendships mean more to them than romances.
They may like to talk during sex (although Mars in Gemini is more indicative of that). Actually, they may prefer to talk about sex rather than doing it. Unless, of course, it’s a threesome. They cannot turn down a threesome. Males with this placement may seem feminine at times, but this does not mean they are necessarily homosexual. Gemini is considered an asexual sign. They can feel intimately close with both sexes. But intimately close for a Gemini is always only skin-deep. Gemini intimacy is a friendly companionship of a detached nature, like an acquaintance. This is the most emotionally-detached sign of the zodiac.
If they love you, they’ll show it lightly and playfully; no heavy emotional displays or extravagant gifts. Theirs is not a passionate-type of love. There will be no deep bonding; they simply don’t have the time. This charming lover will pile on the flattering comments and witty conversation. They’ll court you by taking you to a movie, and they’ll want to discuss the movie afterward over dinner or coffee. Or they may prefer to skip the movie and jump right into the discussion. They’ll talk to you for hours. They are great conversationalists; they have a fundamental need to communicate everything. In the past, Venus in Gemini courted with charming, folded-paper messages and phone calls. Today, they’ll shower you with witty text messages and emails. They’ll take you to all the happening events, and they don’t mind if you invite extra friends to come along. The more the merrier for Venus in Gemini. At dance clubs, they have just as much fun chatting with the bartender, the DJ, the bouncer, and the bathroom attendant as they do dancing. When they have your head spinning from all the social entanglements and 100-mile-per-hour conversations, then it may be safe to guess that they’re interested in you. Enjoy it while you can because it will not last very long. They’ll move on to another flavor tomorrow.
On the positive side, the male Gemini lover is probably the only male in the zodiac that is not attracted to a person based on their looks. The Gemini lover is romantically attracted to brains. He wants a smart, intellectual lover who knows how to carry on a decent conversation. Sure, half-dressed, sexy women with cleavage may distract him for a moment, but he will not be romantically satisfied with such women. When it comes to physical appearance, Venus in Gemini is more attracted to a skinny, athletic-type than a rounded, full-figure woman. But regardless of looks, intelligence and quick wit is what turns them on. Peppy, perky, outgoing and/or tomboyish types also turn them on.
To make your Gemini lover feel loved, be a listener. They need immediate sounding boards for all of their thoughts. If you do this for them, they will feel very close to you. But you must also be talkative, or else they will get bored and leave you. Provide mental stimulation by asking them lots of questions about any subject. Be peppy and outgoing. They need variety, so be interesting. If you have a split personality, even better. To keep a Gemini happy you must allow them freedom to come and go as they please. If you try to cage them in at all, they will disappear. Never mention “commitment” or “marriage” because they will disappear. Don’t be boring, wanting to stay home all the time, because they will leave you. If you’re detecting a pattern here, pat yourself on the back. The Gemini lover is never a permanent lover; they will leave you. Gemini is the first air sign and, like air, comes and goes as it pleases. It’s not that they don’t love you. It’s simply that their need for variety and constant new stimuli inhibits their chances for a lasting relationship or for intimate bonding. If you provide enough freedom, mental stimulation, and forgiveness, your Gemini lover will always return to you after flying off for a bit. You must ask yourself if your nerves can handle that.
Note: Your Venus sign shows your characteristics in close relationships, not necessarily in any other area of your life. Conjunctions to Venus from the outer planets will alter your love style.
The Shadow (human/ego) level of this genetic code, is Dissatisfaction. The pressure of restlessness and unease to improve what is present for something better in the future. Seeking personal satisfaction through self improvement. A low frequency expression of life force that puts pressure on our evolutionary nature to improve and advance. Divine discontent that eventually exhausts the seeker to surrender to what is.
Repressive Response: NONE There is no way to repress dissatisfaction, it can only be reacted to.
Reactive Response: Interfering Getting in the way of natures flow by attempting to micro manage and control the future.
The Gift (soul/spirit) level of this genetic code is Vitality Acceptance of what is and experiencing the joy of your own true nature. Life expressing itself through humanity without resistance. A state of joy that comes from releasing the pressure to seek outside of self. Becoming relaxed with life as consciousness seeks to know and experience itself through awareness. Orientation to life from the heart center that puts one in touch with the pulse of their present environment. Where the joy of an individual desires to contribute to the joy of the whole, creating harmony in all sectors of society.
The Siddhi (source/oneness) level of this genetic code is Bliss. A spontaneous eruption of pure bliss and full awareness that remains permanent. Stillness that is pure, reflective, calm and serene. Consciousness that cannot be localized or focused. Infinite awareness that is full of love for all creation. Bliss states sustained by a certain activation within the DNA that produce refined chemicals within the brain. Realization that is initiated by grace and sustained by love.
Side Note: This Gene Key is one of six (15, 39, 52, 53, 54, 58) in the Codon Ring known as the “Ring of Seeking”. There are 21 Codon Rings within the DNA. These rings are chemical chains that relay biological information between each other in fractal manner. The body acts as a bio computer organizing multiple levels of information. 20 amino acids are combined to create the chemistry needed to respond to the environment.
The Shadow (human/ego) level of this genetic code, is Vanity. Vanity is the first human vice and the last one to let go in the advancement of consciousness. A false sense of independent power fueling a fear based belief that coming from the heart will result in a loss of power. Whenever there is self identification, there is vanity. Vanity that goes beyond words and is hidden in silence as thoughts and feelings. A selfish agenda that is obscure, elusive and hidden, even from the ego.
Repressive Response: Elitist Vanity working undercover. Detached. Taking pride in being “evolved” or different that creates isolation. Fear of being seen as weak.
Reactive Response: Malicious Using vocal gifts to inflict pain on others. The use of language unrestrained to release fear and anger. Emotional power that can be brutal.
The Gift (soul/spirit) level of this genetic code is DiscriminationTo know what and who is healthy for you in life. Where vanity is about only loving yourself, discrimination is about loving the things and people outside yourself that are healthy for you. Attuning to a higher frequency for the purpose of recognizing authenticity or the opposite; concealed agendas. Challenging anything or anyone that is influenced by compromise. The desire to express the deepest yearnings and feelings of our soul. Art and language as a pure expression of emotions and feelings. The passion, beauty and anguish of human yearning. The mythic passage from one state to a higher state that involves a transformation. Through tears and laughter the transcendent enters your body and alters your chemistry leaving you radically and permanently altered; this is transformation.
The Siddhi (source/oneness) level of this genetic code is Purity. Understood only by the higher mind. When the divine falls in love with you and you come within the sphere of divine love. “Falling in Love with the Beloved”. Giving up everything you have attained and embracing death of individual identity and isolation. Purity of the heart, where remembrance of origins dawns and you’re willing to give up your existence. Dissolving the boundaries of the known and unknown. Meeting your own death and being reborn in a higher sphere. Purity in human form, often humble and unseen. Words used poetically within the chambers of the heart that shatter the fears and liberate others. Penetrating the shield or veil of illusion and being swallowed up by life itself.
Side Note: This Gene Key is one of three (12,33,56) in the Codon Ring known as the“Ring of Trials” : “Ring of Secrets)”. There are 21 Codon Rings within the DNA. These rings are chemical chains that relay biological information between each other in fractal manner. The body acts as a bio computer organizing multiple levels of information. 20 amino acids are combined to create the chemistry needed to respond to the environment.